61

Since morning a great commotion had arisen in Gora’s room. First, Mahim came in, drawing on his hookah, and asked Gora, “Well then — has Binoy broken his chains after all this time?”

Gora did not understand, and looked at Mahim’s face in puzzlement. Mahim said, “What is the use of concealing it from us now? Your friend’s news is no longer suppressed — the drums have sounded. See here.”

So saying, Mahim handed Gora a Bengali newspaper. It contained a sharp polemical piece published on the occasion of Binoy’s reported initiation into the Brahmo Samaj that very Sunday. The writer had used extensive bitter language, alleging that while Gora was in jail, certain prominent members of the Brahmo Samaj, burdened with unmarried daughters, had by secret enticement detached this weak-minded young man from orthodox Hindu society.

When Gora said he had no knowledge of this news, Mahim at first refused to believe him, and then repeatedly expressed astonishment at Binoy’s profound dissembling. He went on to say that when Binoy, having explicitly promised to marry Shashimukhi, had then begun to waver and vacillate, they ought to have understood then and there that the seeds of his ruin had been sown.

Abinash arrived breathlessly and cried, “Gaurimohanbabu, what has happened! This is beyond anything we could have dreamed! That Binoybabu at the last —”

Abinash could not finish his sentence. Such was the delight he felt at Binoy’s disgrace that it had become exceedingly difficult for him to maintain the pretence of distress.

Before long, all the leading figures of Gora’s circle had gathered together. A heated and animated discussion ensued among them concerning Binoy. The great majority declared in one voice — there was nothing surprising in the present event, for they had always seen in Binoy’s conduct a certain indecision and sign of weakness; in truth, Binoy had never surrendered himself wholeheartedly to their cause. Many said — it had always been insufferable to them that Binoy, from the very beginning, had tried to pass himself off as Gora’s equal in some fashion; where all others maintained, out of devoted restraint, a respectful distance from Gora, Binoy had thrust himself forward and was on such intimate terms with Gora as to suggest he was set apart from the rest and was Gora’s very peer — all had tolerated this extraordinary presumption only because Gora was fond of him — and such unchecked arrogance invariably met with this lamentable end.

They said: “We are not as learned as Binoybabu, we are not possessed of such very great intelligence, but, friends, we have always held to some principle or other; we do not say one thing and mean another; to behave in one way today and another way tomorrow is not in our nature — call us foolish if you will, call us dimwitted, call us what you like.”

Gora added not a single word to any of this; he sat in silence.

When, as the hour grew late, everyone had departed one by one, Gora saw that Binoy was passing through the side staircase and going upstairs without entering his room. Gora came out quickly and called, “Binoy!”

Binoy descended the stairs and entered Gora’s room, whereupon Gora said, “Binoy, have I done you some wrong unknowingly? It seems to me you have forsaken me.”

Binoy had already decided that a quarrel with Gora was inevitable today, and had come having steeled his heart accordingly. But when he came and found Gora’s face downcast and heard in his voice a note of pained affection, the resolve with which he had forcibly bound himself gave way in an instant and was shattered to pieces.

He burst out, “My friend Gora, do not misunderstand me. In life many changes occur, many things must be given up — but why on that account should friendship be given up?”

Gora was silent for a while, then said, “Binoy, have you taken initiation into the Brahmo Samaj?”

Binoy replied, “No, Gora, I have not, and I shall not do so either. But I do not wish to lay any great stress upon that.”

Gora said, “What do you mean?”

Binoy said, “My meaning is this — whether I take initiation into the Brahmo faith or do not take it is no longer a matter I am inclined to make much of a tumult over.”

Gora asked, “I should like to ask you what your feeling was before, and what it has become now.”

The tone of Gora’s words made Binoy’s mind gird itself once more for battle. He said, “Before, when I used to hear that someone was going to become a Brahmo, I would feel very angry — I used to wish he might somehow be punished for it. But now that feeling does not arise in me. I think one view may be contested by another view, one argument by another argument — but to punish a matter of the intellect with wrath is barbarism.”

Gora said, “Seeing a Hindu become a Brahmo will no longer anger you — but seeing a Brahmo undergo penance to become a Hindu will make you burn with rage. That is the change that has come over you since before.”

Binoy said, “You are saying this out of anger at me — not out of reason.”

Gora said, “I say this out of genuine respect for you — this is precisely how it should have been; had I been in your position, I would have acted no differently. If adopting and abandoning a creed were as effortless as a chameleon changes its hues — a matter merely of the skin’s surface — there would be nothing more to say. But because it is a matter of the innermost being, I have never been able to treat it lightly. If there are no obstacles, if no penalty need be paid, why should a man rouse all his faculties when he embraces or alters a conviction on a grave matter? A man must prove to himself whether he is receiving truth as truth in very deed. The penalty must be accepted. The commerce of truth is no dainty commerce where one may pocket the jewel while evading its price.”

The argument broke free of all restraint. Words came pouring upon words like arrows upon arrows, and in their mutual collision they began to shower sparks of fire.

At last, after a long battle of words, Binoy rose to his feet and said, “Gora, there is a fundamental difference in our natures. For all these years it lay suppressed — whenever it sought to raise its head, I myself pressed it down, for I knew that wherever you perceive a divergence you know no reconciliation; you rush forward at once with sword in hand. And so, in order to preserve your friendship, I have always curtailed my own nature. Today I understand that this has done no good and can do none.”

Gora said, “Tell me plainly — what is your intention now?”

Binoy said, “Today I stand alone. That one must every day offer human sacrifices to the demon called Society in order somehow to keep it placated, and must go about with its yoke of authority bound about one’s neck whether one lives or perishes in the doing — this I cannot accept under any circumstance.”

Gora said, “Are you going out to slay Bakasura with a blade of grass, like that Brahmin boy in the Mahabharata?”

Binoy said, “Whether my blade of grass will slay Bakasura or not I cannot say, but that he has the right to chew me up and swallow me — this I will not concede under any circumstance. Not even while he is in the act of chewing.”

Gora said, “You are speaking entirely in metaphor; it becomes difficult to follow your meaning.”

Binoy said, “It is not difficult for you to follow; it is difficult for you to accept. That our society has bound man — where he is by nature free, where he is by right free — even in his eating, sleeping, and sitting, with utterly meaningless fetters, this you know no less than I do. But you wish to accept this tyranny by means of tyranny itself. I say today: in this matter I will submit to no man’s compulsion. I will acknowledge the claims of society only so long as it protects my rightful claims. If it refuses to count me as a human being, if it seeks to fashion me into a mechanical doll, I too shall not worship it with flowers and sandalwood — I shall regard it as nothing more than an iron machine.”

Gora said, “In brief, then — you intend to become a Brahmo?”

Binoy said, “No.”

Gora said, “You will marry Lalita?”

Binoy said, “Yes.”

Gora asked, “A Hindu marriage?”

Binoy said, “Yes.”

Gora. Is Pareshbabu agreeable to it?

Binoy. Here is his letter.

Gora read Paresh’s letter through twice. Its concluding passage ran as follows —

‘I shall not speak of what pleases or displeases me, nor shall I raise the question of your convenience or difficulty. What my beliefs are, what my community is — you know these things. What education Lalita received from childhood and in what customs she was raised — these too are not unknown to you. With full knowledge of all this, you have chosen your path. I have nothing further to say. Do not suppose that I have abandoned the helm without thought, or having thought without reaching any conclusion. I have reflected to the utmost of my capacity. I have understood this much: there is no religiously valid reason to obstruct your union, for I hold you in complete respect. If society places any impediment here, you are not bound to accept it. I have only this one thing to say: if you would transgress society, you must become greater than society. Let your love, your life together, not merely herald a force of destruction — let it contain within it the truth of creation and preservation. It will not suffice to display a single act of audacity in this one matter; all the work of your life hereafter must be woven upon a thread of heroism — otherwise you will fall very low indeed. For society, from without, will no longer carry you upon the common ground as it carries all others; if by your own strength you do not rise above the common, you will sink below it. I remain with considerable anxiety for your future good or ill. Yet I have no right to obstruct you by reason of that anxiety — for it is those who dare to resolve new problems through the living of their own lives who enlarge society. Those who merely observe its rules carry society upon their shoulders, but do not advance it. Therefore I shall not bar your path with my timidity and my misgiving. Hold fast to what you have understood to be right, against every adversity; may God be your help. God does not chain His creation within any single condition; He stirs it ever awake through new and ever-new transformation. You have set out to carry the torch of your own lives along a difficult path, as messengers of that awakening of His — may He who guides the universe be your guide; I cannot impose upon you the ordinance that you must walk my path forever. In our own youth we too once loosed the rope from the ghat and set our boat upon the face of the storm, heeding no man’s prohibition. To this day I have no repentance for it. And even if occasion for repentance were to arise — what of it? Man will err, will fail, will suffer grief, but he will not sit still; he will surrender himself to what he knows to be right; and in this way the sacred stream of the world’s river will flow on and remain pure forever. To dam that stream forever out of fear that it may occasionally breach its bank and cause brief harm would be to summon pestilence — of this I am certain. Therefore, to that Power which is drawing you with irresistible force beyond ease and comfort and the ordinances of society, I bow with devotion, and entrust you both into His hands; may He render glorious, within your lives, all censure and shame and severance from kindred. He who has called you to the difficult path will bring you to your destination.’

After reading this letter, Gora sat silent for some time, whereupon Binoy said, “Pareshbabu has given his consent from his side — you too, Gora, must give yours from yours.”

Gora said, “Pareshbabu can give his consent, for the current that breaks the bank is their current. I cannot give mine, for our current is one that protects the bank. Upon this bank of ours stand the sky-piercing achievements of a hundred thousand years; we can never say, ‘let the forces of nature work here as they will.’ We shall reinforce our bank with stone — let whoever will condemn us for it. This is our ancient and sacred city — it is not our wish that each year new layers of alluvial soil should settle upon it and that gangs of peasants should come and turn its soil with the plough. It is our city of habitation, not a field of cultivation. And so when your party of cultivators condemns these stones of ours as intractably hard, we feel no mortal shame at the reproach.”

Binoy said, “In brief, then — you will not accept this marriage of ours.”

Gora said, “Most certainly I will not.”

Binoy said, “And —”

Gora said, “And I shall renounce you.”

Binoy said, “What if I were your Muslim friend?”

Gora said, “Then the matter would be otherwise. If a tree’s own branch breaks and falls away and thereby becomes a stranger, the tree can never take it back as its own as before — but a creeper that advances from without can be given shelter, and even if brought down by a storm may be taken up again without impediment. When one’s own becomes a stranger, there is no course but to forsake him entirely. That is precisely why there are so many rules and prohibitions, so desperate a tug and pull.”

Binoy said, “That is all the more reason why the cause for severance ought not to be so trivial, and the provision for severance ought not to be so readily available. It is true that a broken arm cannot be rejoined — and for that very reason it does not break at every word. Its bone is very strong. In a society where the slightest impact causes rupture and that rupture becomes a rupture forever — will you not consider how many impediments that places before a man who would move freely, who would work and act?”

Gora said, “The burden of that deliberation is not upon me. Society deliberates so wholly and so magnificently that I cannot even perceive that it is doing so. For thousands upon thousands of years it has deliberated and preserved itself — this is my confidence. Whether the earth bends or goes straight in its course around the sun, whether it errs or not — I do not think on this, and not thinking on it I have not been deceived to this day. My feeling toward my society is the same.”

Binoy smiled and said, “My friend Gora, these are precisely the arguments I myself have been making all this while in exactly this fashion — who would have thought that today I too would have to hear them! I understand well enough that today I must suffer the punishment for having mouthed words I did not truly feel. But there is no use in disputing further. For there is one thing I have seen today from very close at hand, which I did not see before — today I have understood that the movement of a man’s life is like a great river: it carves new and unforeseen channels in directions where no current flowed before, driven by its own momentum. This variety of course, this unforeseeable transformation — this is the will of Providence. Life is not a dug canal; it cannot be kept to a fixed channel. Now that this truth has become utterly immediate within myself, no artful argument will ever deceive me again.”

Gora said, “When the moth rushes toward the flame, it too makes precisely such arguments as yours — therefore I shall make no futile attempt today to bring you to your senses.”

Binoy rose from his chair and said, “So much the better — then I shall take my leave, and go to pay my respects to mother.”

Binoy departed, and Mahim entered the room at a leisurely pace. Chewing his betel, he asked, “Did not go well, I take it? Nor will it. For how many years have I been saying — be careful, the signs of ruin are showing — but you would not take heed. Had you then somehow forced through the marriage with Shashimukhi by main effort, there would have been nothing to say. But who listens to the crow’s lament! Whom can I tell! One who will not see a thing himself cannot be made to see it even if one beats one’s head against the wall. And now to have lost a boy like Binoy from your camp — is that not cause enough for bitter regret!”

Gora made no reply. Mahim said, “So you could not bring Binoy back? Well, let that be — but there has been considerable trouble over the matter of his marriage to Shashimukhi. Shashi’s wedding cannot be delayed any further now. You know well enough how our society operates — if it gets a person in its grip, it wrings them out between the tears of their eyes and the water of their nose. So a bridegroom — no, do not fear, you need not play matchmaker; I have arranged it all myself.”

Gora asked, “And who is the bridegroom?”

Mahim said, “Your own Abinash.”

Gora said, “Has he consented?”

Mahim said, “Why would he not consent! Is he your Binoy, after all? No — say what you will — it turns out that among all your followers, this Abinash is truly devoted to you. When he heard he was to be joined to your family, he practically danced with delight. He said: this is my good fortune, this is my glory. I asked about the question of money, and at once he put his hands to his ears and said, ‘I beg your pardon, please say nothing of all that to me.’ I said, very well — that matter will be settled with your father. I went to his father as well. The father proved to be quite a different sort from the son. The father put his hands nowhere near his ears at the mention of money; quite the contrary, he launched in so briskly that I myself was tempted to cover mine. I found, too, that in such matters the boy is exceedingly filial — pita hi paramam tapah, as they say — there is no use trying to negotiate through him as intermediary. In the end I could not conclude the business without breaking into the Company bonds. But no matter — do also say a word or two to Abinash. If he receives encouragement from your lips —”

Gora said, “That will not reduce the sum of money by a single anna.”

Mahim said, “That I know — when filial piety becomes serviceable in this way, it is difficult to manage.”

Gora asked, “Has the matter been settled?”

Mahim said, “Yes.”

Gora. And the date fixed?

Mahim. Fixed indeed — on the full-moon day of Magh. That is not far off. The father has said: no diamonds and rubies, but heavy gold ornaments he must have. Now I shall have to consult the goldsmith for a few days to see how I can increase the weight of the gold without increasing the price of it.

Gora said, “But what need is there for such haste? There is no fear that Abinash will enter the Brahmo Samaj anytime soon.”

Mahim said, “That there is not — but you are not observing that Father’s health has been growing very poor of late. The more the doctors object, the more he increases the severity of his regimen. The sannyasi who has lately attached himself to Father bathes him three times a day, and on top of that has set him to such hatha-yoga that his eyes, eyebrows, breath, and pulse are all in danger of being turned quite upside down. It would be best to have Shashi’s wedding done while Father is yet alive — and if we can conclude the matter before his pension savings fall into the hands of Onkaranandswami, I need not worry myself further. I broached the matter with Father only yesterday and found it is no simple affair. I have thought of getting that sannyasi fellow thoroughly plied with hemp for a time, bringing him to heel, and then working through him to get things done. Those who are householders, those who stand in greatest need of money — Father’s money will not come to benefit them, you may be sure of it. My difficulty is this: other men’s fathers exact money with a firm hand, while my own father, at the mere mention of giving money, sits down to pranayama. Am I now to drown myself — with this eleven-year-old girl tied about my neck?”