46

Lalita came to Pareshbabu and said, “Because we are Brahmos, no Hindu girl is willing to come and study with us — so I have been thinking that if we could keep someone from Hindu society involved in the work, it would make things easier. What do you think, Father?”

Pareshbabu asked, “Where will you find someone from Hindu society?”

Lalita had come with her resolve firmly girded, and yet she felt a sudden shyness at the moment of uttering Binoy’s name. Forcing the shyness aside, she said, “Why, surely someone can be found? There is Binoy-babu, for instance — or—”

That “or” was an altogether futile utterance, a wasteful squandering of a conjunction. It remained incomplete.

Paresh said, “Binoy! Why should Binoy agree to it?”

Lalita’s pride was stung. Binoy-babu would not agree! Lalita understood very well that persuading Binoy-babu was not beyond her power.

Lalita said, “He may well agree.”

Paresh sat still for a moment and then said, “When he has considered everything carefully, he will never agree.”

The tips of Lalita’s ears grew red. She took up the bunch of keys tied in her sari-end and began fidgeting with them.

Looking at the face of this distressed daughter of his, Paresh felt a pang of sorrow in his heart. But he could find no words of comfort. After some time, Lalita slowly raised her face and said, “Father, then our school can never come to be, in any way at all!”

Paresh said, “I can see many obstacles to its happening at present. Any attempt to proceed will only rouse a great deal of unpleasant discussion.”

That Panu-babu would triumph in the end and that they would have to bow in silence before injustice — for Lalita there was no greater sorrow than this. Outside of her father’s authority, she could not endure the constraint of any other person for so much as a moment. She did not fear unpleasantness — but how was she to bear injustice? Slowly and quietly she rose and left Pareshbabu’s presence.

Going to her own room, she found that a letter had arrived in the post addressed to her. From the handwriting she recognised it as the hand of her childhood friend Shailabala. Shailabala was married and lived in Bankipore with her husband.

The letter contained the following:

‘I had been greatly troubled on hearing all manner of things concerning you. For a long while I have been thinking of writing to inquire after you — but the moment never seemed right. Yet the day before yesterday a piece of news reached me from a certain person (whose name I shall not mention) which fell upon me like a thunderbolt. I cannot bring myself to believe such a thing possible. And yet it is difficult to disbelieve the one who has written it. It appears that the possibility of your marriage with some Hindu young man has arisen. If this be true —’ and so on and so forth.

Lalita’s whole body blazed with rage. She could not wait a single moment. Then and there she wrote in reply to that letter:

‘That you should have sent to question me in order to ascertain whether the news be true or not — this itself strikes me as astonishing. Must even the information given you by a member of the Brahmo Samaj be verified! Such distrust! And then, upon receiving word that the possibility of my marriage with some Hindu young man has arisen, a thunderbolt has struck you — yet I can tell you with certainty that there exist within the Brahmo Samaj celebrated saintly young men whose prospect of marriage is as dreadful as a thunderbolt itself, and I know one or two Hindu young men whose union in marriage would be a matter of honour for any Brahmo girl. Beyond this, I have no desire to say another word to you.’

Meanwhile, Pareshbabu’s work for that day came to a halt. He sat in silence and pondered for a long while. Then, lost in thought, he slowly made his way and presented himself at Sucharita’s room. Seeing Paresh’s troubled countenance, Sucharita’s heart was pierced with pain. She knew well enough what it was that weighed upon him, and it was precisely this very concern that had kept Sucharita herself anxious for the past several days.

Pareshbabu sat down with Sucharita in a private room and said, “Ma, the time has come to think seriously about Lalita.”

Sucharita, keeping her compassionate gaze fixed upon Pareshbabu’s face, said, “I know, Baba!”

Pareshbabu said, “I am not thinking of social censure. What I am wondering is — tell me, does Lalita —”

Seeing Paresh’s hesitation, Sucharita herself endeavoured to make the matter plain. She said, “Lalita has always opened her heart fully to me. But for some days past she no longer surrenders herself to me in the same way. I can clearly perceive —”

Paresh interjected from the middle, “Some feeling has arisen in Lalita’s heart which she does not wish to acknowledge even to herself. I cannot think what is to be done for her good — what do you say: has any harm been done to Lalita by allowing Binoy to visit our family?”

Sucharita said, “Baba, you know very well that there is no fault in Binoybabu — his unblemished nature — a gentleman of his natural refinement is rarely to be met with.”

Pareshbabu seemed to have arrived at some new understanding. He exclaimed, “You have spoken truly, Radhe, you have spoken truly. Whether he is a good man — that is the only thing to be seen — the all-knowing God sees precisely that. Binoy is a good man, and in this my judgment has not erred, for which I offer him my repeated salutations.”

A web had been cut through — Pareshbabu felt as though he had been delivered. Pareshbabu had committed no wrong before his God. The eternal scale of righteousness by which God weighs a human being — that was the measure he had accepted; he had not mixed into it any artificial weight fashioned by his own society, and for this reason no shadow of remorse remained in his mind. He felt a sense of wonder that he had suffered such anguish for so long without understanding this most simple of truths. Laying his hand upon Sucharita’s head, he said, “Today I have received a lesson from you, Ma!”

Sucharita immediately took the dust of his feet and said, “No, no, what are you saying, Baba!”

Pareshbabu said, “A sect is such a thing that it causes man to forget altogether the simplest truth of all — that a man is a man. It elevates the socially constructed notion of whether a man is Brahmo or Hindu above the truth of the universe, and fashions a whirlpool from it — all this while I had been going round and round in falsehood within it.”

After a brief silence, Paresh said, “Lalita cannot bring herself to abandon her resolve about the girls’ school. She seeks my permission to take Binoy’s help in the matter.”

Sucharita said, “No, Baba, let it rest for a while.”

The picture of Lalita rising in silent self-restraint — suppressing the entire force of her agitated heart the very moment he had forbidden her — weighed most grievously upon Paresh’s tender-hearted mind. He knew that his spirited daughter had suffered less from the unjust persecution that society was visiting upon her than from being prevented from struggling against that injustice — and especially from meeting that obstruction at the hands of her own father. For this reason he had been eager to withdraw his prohibition. He said, “Why, Radhe, why should it wait?”

Sucharita said, “Otherwise Mother will grow greatly displeased.”

Paresh considered, and found the point just.

Satish entered the room and whispered something in Sucharita’s ear. Sucharita said, “No, dear Bakhtiyar, not now. It can happen tomorrow.”

Satish said with a dejected air, “But tomorrow I have school.”

Paresh smiled with tender affection and said, “What is it, Satish, what do you want?”

Sucharita said, “He has a —”

Satish jumped up in agitation, pressed his hand over Sucharita’s mouth, and cried, “No, no, don’t say it, don’t say it!”

Pareshbabu said, “If it is a secret matter, why should Sucharita tell it?”

Sucharita said, “No, Baba, it is quite certain that his greatest wish is for this very secret to reach your ears.”

Satish cried out aloud, “Never, certainly never!”

And with that he bolted from the room.

He had intended to show Sucharita the composition which Binoy had praised so highly. Needless to say, Sucharita had perfectly divined the purpose of whispering this reminder into her ear in Paresh’s presence. Poor Satish had no notion that the intentions of such deep minds could be so easily detected in this world.