49

Bihari had been wondering how he could bring himself to look upon poor Asha's face. The moment he stepped through the gateway, the dense sorrow of the whole forsaken house descended upon him like a shroud. Glancing at the faces of the gatekeeper and the servants, he felt his head bow with shame on behalf of Mahendra --- that unhinged, absconded man. He could not bring himself to greet the familiar domestics with his old warmth. His feet seemed to resist carrying him into the inner apartments.

For Mahendra had flung helpless Asha into a humiliation so public, so brutal --- the sort that strips a woman of her last veil of dignity, leaving her exposed before the curious, pitying eyes of the whole world. To see Asha standing in that nakedness of dishonour, flinching and wounded --- Bihari could not imagine how he was to endure it. But there was no longer time for such thoughts or hesitations. He had barely entered the inner quarters when Asha came swiftly towards him and said, "Thakurpo, please come quickly --- Mother is in great distress." It was the first time Asha had spoken to Bihari openly, face to face.

In the dark days of sorrow, a single sudden blow sweeps away every barrier. Those who have lived at a distance from one another find themselves thrown together upon the same narrow strip of high ground when the flood-waters rise without warning. Asha's unguarded agitation struck Bihari to the heart. From this small thing alone he understood, more fully than ever before, what Mahendra had done to this household. As in times of calamity the adornments and comforts of a home are abandoned without a thought, so too the mistress of this house had no leisure left to preserve even the modest grace of a woman's modesty --- every small screen and shelter had fallen away, and there was no moment to spare for such things any longer.

Bihari entered Rajlakshmi's room. She had suffered a sudden attack of breathlessness and turned pale; but as the episode had not lasted long, she had recovered somewhat. Bihari prostrated himself in salutation and took the dust of her feet, whereupon Rajlakshmi gestured for him to sit beside her and said slowly, "How are you, Bihari? It has been so long since I have seen you."

"Mother," said Bihari, "why did you not send word of your illness? Would I have delayed for a single moment?" Rajlakshmi said softly, "Do I not know that, my child? I did not carry you in my womb --- yet in all the world, is there anyone more truly my own than you?" As she spoke, tears began to fall from her eyes.

Bihari rose quickly and busied himself examining the bottles and tins of medicine in the alcove, using the pretence to compose himself. When he returned and was about to feel her pulse, Rajlakshmi said, "Never mind my pulse --- tell me, why have you grown so thin, Bihari?" And she raised her wasted hand to run it over his collarbones.

"These bones of mine will not be covered," said Bihari, "until I have eaten your fish curry again. Get well quickly, Mother --- I shall have the kitchen in readiness." Rajlakshmi smiled faintly and said, "Make your preparations early, dear boy --- but not for the kitchen." She pressed his hand and said, "Bihari, bring a wife home. There is no one to look after you. Mejobou, you and the others must arrange a marriage for Bihari --- look at the state the poor child has fallen into." Annapurna said, "You must get well first, Didi. This is your task --- you shall see it done, and we shall all join in the rejoicing." Rajlakshmi said, "I shall not have time, Mejobou. Bihari's welfare now rests with you all --- make him happy. I could not repay my debt to him --- but God will bless him." Saying so, she passed her right hand gently over Bihari's head.

Asha could stay in the room no longer --- she went out to weep. Annapurna gazed at Bihari's face through her tears with an expression of deep tenderness. Something suddenly occurred to Rajlakshmi. She called out, "Bouma --- Bouma." The moment Asha stepped in, she asked, "You have seen to Bihari's meal, have you not?"

"Mother," said Bihari, "this greedy son of yours is well known to everyone here. As I came through the gateway, I saw the fish-man trotting briskly towards the inner rooms with a basket of large koi, every one of them with eggs --- I knew at once that my reputation in this house remains intact!" And with a smile he glanced at Asha.

Asha felt no embarrassment today. She accepted his teasing with an affectionate smile. She had not fully grasped before how much Bihari meant to this household --- she had at times dismissed him as an unnecessary intruder and shown it plainly in her manner. Now, stricken with remorse for that, her esteem and compassion for him surged forward. Rajlakshmi said, "Mejobou, this is not work for the cook --- you must oversee the cooking yourself. Our Bangal boy here cannot eat without a great deal of chilli."

"Your mother was a daughter of Bikrampur, and you call me --- a gentleman's son of Nadia district --- a Bangal?" said Bihari.

"I cannot bear it." Much good-humoured banter followed, and for the first time in many days the weight of sorrow in Mahendra's house seemed to lighten a little.

Yet throughout all this talk, not one of them uttered Mahendra's name. In former times, talk of Mahendra had been the very substance of all that Rajlakshmi shared with Bihari; Mahendra himself had often laughed at his mother for it. That today no mention of Mahendra passed Rajlakshmi's lips left Bihari silently stunned. The moment Rajlakshmi dozed off, Bihari went out and said to Annapurna, "Mother's illness is no trifling matter."

"That much is plain to see," said Annapurna, and settled herself near the window of her room.

After a long silence she said, "Will you not bring Mahin here, Bihari? There should be no more delay." Bihari was silent for a moment, then said, "I will do whatever you command. Does anyone know where he is?"

"Not exactly --- he will have to be found. Bihari, there is another thing I must tell you. Look at Asha's face. If you cannot rescue Mahendra from Binodini's grasp, she will not survive. One look at her and you will know that the arrow of death has already found her heart." Bihari laughed inwardly, with a bitterness he kept hidden.

"Rescue another, shall I --- my God, who will rescue me?" Aloud he said, "Kakima, do I know any charm that could keep Mahendra from Binodini's pull for ever? He may be quiet for a few days because of Mother's illness, but how can I say he will not go back?" Just then Asha, clad in plain garments and with her veil drawn halfway over her head, came quietly and sat at her aunt's feet.

Knowing that Annapurna and Bihari were discussing Rajlakshmi's illness, she had come with anxious ears. Seeing upon that faithful wife's face the still, silent grandeur of a sorrow borne without complaint, Bihari felt an extraordinary reverence kindle within him. Baptised in the burning waters of grief, this young woman had acquired an unshakeable dignity, like the goddesses of an older age --- she was no longer a merely ordinary woman; it seemed that in her great suffering she had attained the years and stature of the chaste heroines of the Puranas.

Bihari discussed with Asha the matter of Rajlakshmi's diet and medicine, and when he took his leave of her, he drew a long breath and said to Annapurna, "I will bring Mahendra back." At Mahendra's bank, Bihari learned that Mahendra had recently begun transactions with their Allahabad branch.